Bettie Bookish

A little diversification

For about a year, I was writing a column for a couple of different outlets called Shopsy. It was about shopping, which I actually hate doing. All the more reason for me to love shopping blogs.

It's no longer running anywhere because the pulp-based publishers decided that the column should be devoted exclusively to local products available in local brick-and-mortar shops, in order to better serve the local community by being really, really local and other stuff, like local.

Also, that made it easier for them to sell ads to local shops, which was the real reason for the mandate.

Whatever.

But because I really did like writing it, I've decided to keep it going as a blog.

So, go ahead. Get a little Shopsy.

Goodbye, Norge

What follows is a column I wrote about getting rid of my Mommyvan.

Au Revoir, Mon Amie

It felt a little like taking an old dog to the vet to be put down.

Yesterday morning, I got into my cherished, beautiful, powerful, convenient Mommyvan, knowing it would be the last time I would ever drive her to work.

I patted her dashboard.

"You know I love you, right? This isn't because I don't love you. And I would keep you if I could."

It wasn't a lie. I do love that van. And when Honda came out earlier this year with the new ad campaign for the meaner, leaner 2008 Odyssey minivan, and commanded all of us to Respect the Van, I bowed in submission. Oh, yes. I do. Respect the van.

I do not, however, have the means to spend what it would take to get myself into a model with  the ability to climb a snowy driveway. And my poor Mommyvan - this is just so sad - can scarcely make it over a thin layer of wet leaves without spinning her sweet little wheels.

"Come on, girl, you can make it. You can do it - I think you can, I think you can, I think ... I'm going to have to walk up the driveway."

I've known since last winter, when the Mommyvan spent more time parked at the bottom of the driveway than at the top, that a new vehicle was going to be a necessity. But knowing it would happen hasn't made it easier.

But we've made the most of it. We've taken some fun trips together. She's criss-crossed New York at least a dozen times, and we even drove all the way to Florida and back. And if anyone doubts the sheer muscle of the Mommyvan, I need only produce the speeding tickets she has facilitated.

Sure, she got me into some trouble. But she also got me down the East Coast in supreme comfort. And except for that one little flaw of propelling with only two wheels, she has been nothing but reliable.

She was there when we had to take Posey to the emergency room because she was croupy, and when she had a staph infection and when she was dehydrated from throwing up all night. She drove us over the river and through the woods to holidays and birthday parties and dinners out when we were too tired to cook.

She just couldn't always bring us all the way up the driveway when we got home. It's only one flaw, but it's a big one.

We drove to the car dealership at lunchtime. As I cleared the last of my stuff out of her glovebox, I told her to cheer up.

"You'll find a great new owner. You'll have lots of fun and go on lots of trips. They'll probably even keep you clean and not let the kids eat trail mix in their carseats. Won't that be great? You're gonna be fine."

I handed her keys over to the car sales person, and she gave me the keys to my new ride. I chose an Outback because, well, it drives on all four wheels. And what it lacks in sheer square footage and number of cup-holders it makes up for in fuel efficiency. She's not quite as powerful as the Mommyvan, but she has heated seats. She's built for Upstate winters.

And she's pretty enough, shiny and black and nearly new.

When I got her back to work, where three of my four co-workers also own Subarus, my boss said, "Oooh, I see you got the ninja Subaru. Nice."

That's right. If I can't drive a road-owning Mommyvan, I'll drive a Subaru with ninja upgrade package. A Ninjaru.

Respect the Ninjaru.

The Deerslayer

This morning, I was behind two snowplows and a salt truck on my way to work. I was pretty far behind them, as they were all driving at a good clip.

The salt truck was directly in front of me, and I could tell there was a white bag of something or other bouncing along in an apparatus that was something like a hammock affixed to the rear bumper area of the truck.

I drove behind the truck for probably 10 miles or more, wondering exactly how the truck conveys its salt to the road with that crude salt hammock. Is there some kind of weight-responsive sensor that alerts the driver that the bag of salt has run out? Does he just guess?

Then we all approached an all-way stop light, and I pulled close behind the truck I was following. I realized that the white I had been seeing was not a bag of salt, but the white belly of a dead deer that was bouncing along in the bumper hammock.

Happy Morning!

Snow. Yes. Snow.

The forecast says tomorrow morning will bring snow. And me, without my Subaru.

But that's not your problem. Maybe your problem is that you don;t know what to wear tomorrow. Maybe you think you need some new clothes. Maybe you want a modest swimsuit.

Oh, have I got an answer for you, and it just happens to be the longest URL I've ever seen:

http://www.modestapparelchristianclothinglydiaofpurpledressescustomsewing.com

NaBloPoMo

First of all, I love the idea of NaBloPoMo - National Blog Posting Month, in which the goal is to post every day during November. I also love that - as of Nov. 5, I'm already five days late. Hey - maybe I can use the technology to "go back in time" and "post every day."

What I love most about the initiative is that it is an alternative to NaNoWriMo, and allegedly more achievable. Ha.

In short, yes, I am blogging daily and pestering my colleagues to blog daily for Ye Olde Companie Blogue, as Figlet so aptly called it. And I'm doing a much better job of it there than I am here.

But this I will promise you: I will blog more than once in November. Whatever occurs, I will blog for you.

In the meantime, perhaps you would enjoy some photos from Halloween and Posey's 2nd birthday party.